Treadmill!

I really prefer cross trainers over treadmills any day, BUT, my auntie is letting me borrow her treadmill as it's been an ornament in her house for some time now. I'm totally excited, i have almost no space in my room though. I WILL find some! I'm very excited as i've been so so slack with exercising since i got sick.

It really threw me off when i got sick a few weeks ago. I had been doing over an hour of cardio a day with zumba and other exercises and then i got too sick to do anything. I did Zumba a few days ago but not since then. I also got a Yoga DVD a day ago for only $3.99! I haven't done Yoga before but i heard it's very relaxing and can clear your mind.

A lot has been on my mind lately and have been sleeping terribly. As soon as i'm alone in my mind (like when i'm showering or before bed and BF has fallen alseep) my mind wakes up and starts going over all these images and thoughts that i don't want to see. I was sexually abused as a kid and these images won't go away. Since my dad died they have been so vivid and it's becoming a real problem.

I applied for sexual abuse counselling last week but there is a 12 week waiting list in my area. So, i'm not sure how i'm going to cope. I have general counselling every week with a male, he referred me for the other counselling as he feels as though he's not equipped in that area very well. Also, it's kinda weird talking about that more personal stuff with a male.



So on my analog scales i'm 50 kilos and on my digital i'm 52.  The digital ones are a lot older and the analog ones are brand new.  So i don't know who to trust. But anyway, i've been on a plateau for some time now. Any advice on how to get out of there!? It's annoying.

It's 12pm and all i've had is a 100cal pack of Milo Oats. Just found them, they are amaziiiiing! So i'm going well - for now.

Hope everyone is doing well.

xx